Intersections

20171221 0919 Thursday

Hola people.

For some reasons I am feeling like this week is so panjang.. its as if time is moving super slow.. and I am not sure why exactly but I feel like I cant wait for the week to be over, as well as next week to be over so I will be done with this company.

Leaving this company without any offer from other company is actually quite terrifying but I know I have to do this. I know and I am certain that leaving this company is what I need to do, and it is the right decision for me.

Although it comes with the scare of not being able to provide for the family due to having no employment, I believe that its God that provides for us and not this company.. knowing this it makes me feel more at ease and confident with the decision.. Despite having the scare once in a while, each time I remind myself of this fact, I will be at ease.. having faith on Him that things will be fine and good for my family..

Must I talk about what is/are the reason(s) that I am no longer able to put out with the company?

I believe maybe not.. coz I do not see the benefits of it..

Earlier this week on Monday I had an interview with another company, an MNC from German who produces machines for making cigarettes.. I know cigarette is haram for muslim but I am not sure about working for the company who makes the machine that makes the cigarettes.. is it haram as well?

I guess I need to ask alim ulama` about it.. do I have doubt? Yes I do.. so what do I do if I got the offer? Should I just accept it first? Just because I want to feel secure having a job, being employed?

It has always been my principle that if I have doubt about something, I will not do it.. but the opportunity seems like its too good to pass.. so what I must do now is to check with the alim ulamak on the hukum hakam..

I actually paused this post, googled the whatsapp number for tanyalah ustaz tv9 and I sent them the question.. yet to be answered

Lately while I was riding my bike I wud be thinking about many things, mostly positive things, things that can make me smile. I am trying to remember them right now but I cant seem to.. its so funny..

I remember this morning on the bike I was thinking about nursajat who is venturing into property business, which is a good thing.. and I asked myself, if she can do it why cant i? is it because shes already rich from her other businesses so it is easier for her to make more money coz she has the capital.. well that is true, but then I can ask the next question how did her other businesses become successful? Is she a very smart person? Or is she plain lucky? Or is she the kind of person who works hard, and discipline with her money & spending? From what I know she didn’t come from a rich family, so how could she become successful like today?

I know its so random that I thought of nursajat, the same could be said about many other businessman/woman who are successful (just random).. the key to it is working hard and perseverance..

Why am I talking about business? Am I planning to do a business?

I no longer have that plan in mind to be honest. I used to do.. but as time passed, I began to realize that its not so easy.. and for some reasons I just don’t feel like I want to go thru the hassle of being busy all the time with the business until I will have no time for my family.. and life..

For now what I have in mind is to further my studies.. I hope Its not too late. I am only 30 years old today.. I think itll be good for me to have a master’s degree, then insya-allah if God wills it I will further some more to take phd.. I know its not going to be easy but I know for certain that this is a good thing and Allah will help me and my family thru it all.. I see this as a similar thing to me getting married, it was a challenge for me and my wife and we both believed that we were doing a good thing and Alhamdulillah, God made it easier for us and it went well.. we managed every obstacle one by and one and here are today, happily married w a comel kid AhnafUkail, who is my whole life right now.. insyallah, we plan to have more children, but no rush, just trust that its all in Gods plan..

So why they sudden desire/want to further study? it was during one night when we had to sleep in wangsa maju, at my parents house when my degree cert just came from NZ, one that I had asked for replacement because the original one is lost(I might have misplaced it somewhere and unable to locate it so I decided to just ask for a replacement).. and looking at the degree cert which I had earned thru the hard work of 4 years in a foreign land, being New Zealand, it is something I need and I can be proud of.. and I know then that I want to have that same thing again but this time in my own country.. I started googling master degree programs that are being offered at UITM, UniKL(.. and now I feel even more confident that I can do it.. insya-allah.. I don’t want to get overconfident tho.. but I know it is all do-able.. the PHD part is still too far for me to be thinking for now but I will get there.. I have actually considered a few topics of field of research that I can actually be doing/interested in doing but I will not discuss them here coz as I said, it is still too far ahead in the future.. I will focus with the task at hand for now which is to get my masters degree..

So for now Im kinda at an intersection, one being to go work for the cigarette making company, in which if I do, I don’t think I will be able to do my masters degree as the job requires me to travel most of the time (they have not even offered me the position yet, but its fun to imagine and plan things in advance), the other path that I can take is to do grab/uber for now which will give me the flexibility of time to do my masters degree.. honestly speaking, if I was ever at the point where I have to choose, I don’t know which one I will take.. I will have to wait for the answer from the alim ulamak about the hukum of working for the cigarette making company coz that will be a really be big factor to weigh in, could be a deal breaker if its actually haram.. (I still need to get 2^nd opinion tho and not just from 1 POV)

Well either way, I pray for the best.. that is what I should be doing at this point.. always pray and ask God for the best, and have faith that whatever path that I will take, it is in God’s plan.. coz He knows whats best for me and my family, and insyallah no regrets..

Owh I forgot to mention earlier, when I was contacted by the HR manager of the cigarette machine company, it was merely 2 or 3 days after I had a discussion w my wife. Celebrating our 3^rd year anniversary, we were having dinner at an Indonesian restaurant, and the meal I had reminded me of the time when I was in Indonesia w a colleague on a commissioning job while I was still working for Omega integration. My wife noticed the change in my facial expression and then asked whats wrong and I told her that I had missed working like how I used to.. to travel for work, which I did quite often when I was with Omega.. and its like God’s plan that the company HR contacted me, that I was presented with this opportunity again..

I know it sounds like all so good but I really need to be certain about the hokum of working for the company before accepting any offer (there is no offer yet, hahaha)

During the interview the Manager learned that I used to study in NZ and asked, what if theres an open position in New Zealand and they want to be work there, what do I say to that?

I was like.. Girrrrrl, don’t play w me boo… I mean like I will never say no to that kind of opportunity..

Never in my life time will I reject that kind of offer.. LOLZ.. that’s exactly how I wished I had responded to her question but of coz not.. I had to maintain the level of professionalism answering that question.. I simply said “I would love that”

Owh another thing that id like to share here.. this is quite an old news but I think its still a good news..last month in November I sat for the online exam for the PTD M41, that is Pegawai Tadbir Diplomatik, which is one of the most coveted positions in the Malaysian Government.. (I feel like I have told this story somewhere but I cant remember where)

Preparing for the online exam I actually did research and came across this website timkerjaya where they actually sell e-books to help us study.. ebooks and notes with the relevant topics and syllabus for the online exam.. and I didn’t think twice to but them coz I thought id rather not regret failing the test just because I was too stingy to spend money on the notes.. the online test was on a Friday, and I even skipped work that day coz I wanted to finish my studying.. hahaha but I actually spent most of the day watching breaking bad, and only spent the last few hours to study..

Well I have no regrets, yes the notes have been a help but knowing how I work, I know that even if I had spent the entire day studying, it wud not have made any difference.. actually I have finished reading the notes the night before, I just needed some time to do the sample questions so that’s what I did..

And so I studied hard for the exam, and Alhamdulillah I passed the online test.. so I checked the internet, the next stage they will call the candidates for an assessment which includes a physical fitness test, public speaking, working in a group and etc.. but alas up until today I am still waiting for them to call me.. but I will not lose hope.. I don’t want to get stressed out, if its meant to be it will be.. so lets just chill them titties.. lolzz

Okla I guess that is long enough for today.. I need to complete this sales quote coz I need to go to Genting this evening.. huhu.. so till next time.. later~~