Sunday 23 July 2023

Kemurungan sikit... tapi takmo la dwell in it...

 

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Lately ni rasa macam selalu pulak mengalami kemurungan… although I don’t think that I am facing a major depression episode, but it still sucks…

The first thing, or the main reason that I believe is the major contributor to me feeling depressed is due to the fact that I had just been scammed… I lost about RM300 to the scammer… and I was about to get angry at my wife because apparently she had the similar experience before, but she never told me, never warned me… and I felt quite angry because she didn’t…. then I took a step back and really evaluate the situation, I really shouldn’t blame her, because this was my mistake, and blaming other people is just unhealthy and will not solve the problem…

After being scammed, feeling sad and angry, I understand why she was reluctant or didn’t want to talk to me about it… I feel the same way too… because its not a pleasant thing and I would not want to relive the experience, nor talk about it… so I understand why she didn’t tell me…

But I think its good to talk about it, so we could move on and also warn others to not be the next victims…

Anyhoot, I think I am pretty much over my sadness or upset feeling about the getting scammed incident… I just want to move on…

Next…

The last weekend I was feeling very gloomy and not in the mood for anything… I still do actually, but I really don’t want to dwell in it too long, coz I know it don’t bring me any good…

over the weekend i didnt do much, spent most of the time at home, or in bed... which is the typical behavior of depressed people... not sure on the level of severity though coz today i got up and went to work... hopefully, it will go away soon... 

Next... of being jealous or envious and feeling sad of own self....

This morning I found out that a friend of mine had just gotten a new job, and I can only assume it comes with a better bigger paycheck, and the first thing that came to mind was that I was feeling envious and kinda sad, thinking of my position at the moment, it is far behind my other friends…

I know its unhealthy to compare yourself to others, I guess its one of those times when syaitan will come to you and start whispering, putting unpleasant thoughts into your mind, so you would feel bad and not grateful with what you have in your life…

Again, just be positive, and be happy for the friend… it’s the right and the better thing to do, rather than to feel bad and jealous of others’ successes.

And we need to always count our blessings kan, and to remember that what we have now, the position that we are currently in, this is what is best for us at the moment, and insyaallah when the time comes, when the time is right, we too will get to experience success… just keep doing what you do, and work hard, and make doa, insyaallah our time will come… lagi satu, success is not only measured by the amount of money that you have, it is different to different people… surely I am successful in other aspects kan…. As long as we are happy and content and grateful with ourselves, that is also a measure of success if you ask me….

And also if the type of success that you crave doesn’t come, that’s fine to… surely we have other things to be grateful for… surely Allah is fair…

 

Oklah da malas nak bebel banyak2… nanti tulis lagi… toodles~~

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